Seaside Suicide

"I woke to the calling of sea..
The silent waves broke and disappeared.
The shore is faded. The sky was light.
There is no colour
Only black and white." ---ME

Recently I was told to update my blogs regularly. Well, I doubt too many out there are interested in my crummy little life, which seems to have gotten crummier.
Yes, yes more ranting and babbling up ahead. I like to complain. In fact, I create situations in my life that would allow me to complain and sulk. If you have read my previous blogs, then you will know that I have recently moved to Wales.
Over the summer, I have had a wonderful time travelling back to Amsterdam and then going on to Berlin and Prague before setting up shop in Wales. ATTENTION Travel bugs: Prague is a must see!!! And cheap cheap cheap.
My lovely memories of my holiday have been scarred by a nasty break-up with my boyfriend...Well...not that nasty but I have to complain you see.
This is where I actually own up to being wacko woman. I drove the poor guy to insanity with my behaviour. Picture this!! last night I called the man more than 50 times because he hung up on me!!!
So for those singles out there, even thinking of dating me....DON'T
I don't come with warning signs. I am like one of those wonder products that you get so used to (to the extent that you cannot do without them) and they give you cancer after 20 years.
The truth of the matter is I am hopelessly depressed. I stared at the sea for a long time yesterday just wanting to jump in and disappear. Wonder what it would be like..
I can picture myself floating. The water chills my bones. I am trying really hard to drown, the my face can feel the last few bubbles of air escaping from my nose. Then I have a moment of Zen and I realise that I should not be dying but its too late!!! What a tragedy that would be.

Anyway, I have embarrassed myself to the core and I doubt that the man I so hopelessly adore will ever want to talk to me again.
The good thing however is now I know I am mad, I will not get into any relationships henceforth. (Yeah yeah I know everyone says that, but everyone is not cuckoo in the head like me)

I promise to update this blog from now on regularly...